Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Once upon a time, she loved the sea and it loved her back...

 P.S : There is a beautiful story, 'Kodathividhikkappuram' written by my favourite writer, P.Padmarajan which gave me the insight to plot this post.In the story, there is a male chauvinist who murders the heroine each time she tries to rise up. Here the words 'murder', 'stabbing' doesn't have a literal meaning but it means figuratively...
    A strengthening breeze parted the clouds, allowing the moonlight to glint over the sea. And there on the ground, she was lying with her stabbed wounds bleeding profusely. Swirling around in pain with the blood all over her body, when a breeze touched her so tenderly, she began to feel herself better. After sixty minutes of time, she brought her head up sharply and opened her eyes wide to get a clear vision of the surroundings and of the man.  Slowly she began to rise up. She looked straight, there she saw him standing on the edge, watching the waves of the sea washing off the shore. She looked above and saw the same moonlight, yes that same moonlight under which they had their first kiss. 

   Fluttering away the hurts he had caused in the sea breeze, smiling to the beautiful memories, he had given her, she called his name with all the affections and love once again in her lightest voice, "Raj......................." Yes, it echoed! The search light touched the shore. The breeze was moving cool and careless. Still with those uncured wounds reminding her pain each and every second, but forgetting that it is he who stabbed her, forgetting that it is he who gave her that worst-est pain, she expressed her love for one more time.

   Turning behind to her call, he moved her side,pulled her inside his arms, kissed her on the forehead and uttered those finest words,  "What Honey...!! Does it pain? I am sorry dear. I still love you... ". As if awaken to a reverie,she hugged him tight, tightly to her soul, holding on to him with all the physical pain of her body which  was long enough to convey him that she has forgiven him.

And now
The sea was calm...
And so was her heart. 
But again..., 
...even before the next breeze has reached its direction, even before that beautiful smile has blown off from her cheeks, he pushed her aside,quite heartlessly and aggressively. With tears rolling down her eyes, she fell down on the shore. And, before she was trying to rise up, he reached her with a heart breaking voice, stabbed, stabbed, stabbed and repeatedly stabbed. The wounds were bleeding in her arms, her abdomen like a river, unknowing its destination. Knowing that, his next direction will be on to her chest, she wanted to get up and run away..With roaring pain bleeding so deep through her body, she got up from the ground trying to run away from the place but again the devil in him had chased her. 

   However far she had gone, her distance was very less. She moved but could not move  on.And he realized it well, however he ill-treat her or threaten her, she always surrender before him. And every time she tried to get up, he stabbed her with his sharp edged knife. Finally, his destination has reached..yes,her chest - he stabbed her wildly, furiously without pulling out the knife from her body. He kept it fixed on her chest. He wanted it to be. Thus leaving the knife to be blunt on her chest forever, he walked away...out of her sight...out of her life. 

  Her chest felt its sharp edges. She wanted to be cured. But she was unable to pull the knife outside her chest,or push it inside. Because she knew pushing it inside will cause her more injuries but pulling it out will be her death.So she left it to rest on her chest ever and forever. She knew, it was his knife...his touch, his finger prints rest on it...

And from then, she remained to lie on the ground bleeding, with her senses filled with taste of bile, that sickening smell of the blood and the burning flesh. Still, she could not let him out of her mind and body. She still felt the sweet smell of his Arabian perfume which the breeze had brought to her, despite of her intolerable pain... She lied down there , right there without moving her body an inch,waiting and hoping  for the waves to wash her from the shore.

Years passed, many sunsets had gone by, many sunrises had come,
the waves came, the waves went. 
But she still lies there, facing the sea,
her body sculpted on the shore with her beautiful curves,
projecting tall and wide
facing the sea, like a mermaid 
but towered as a mountain,
burying her pains in the sea, with her salty tears along with the salty waves 
on the shore.
but as the sea 

Here she still lies as the mountain facing the sea, tall, dark yet as beautiful as she was... 
Because once upon a time she loved the sea and it loved her back..

Saturday, May 11, 2013

The Universal Truth

There is a woman at every home who anxiously waits near the doorstep for the safe return of you whenever you step out. There is also a woman who skips her breakfasts and runs behind that last bus to reach her office after packing up the lunch boxes for everyone of you . And you know, there is another woman who says “I don’t feel hungry” and skips her food whenever there is a shortage of stuffs during those dinner times just because she wants you to be full...

Meanwhile, I cannot forget the skinny woman who begs inside the railway compartment, wanders on streets, eat from the bins, sleeps under the bridges unsafe but still shows the strength to cuddle up her little one who is swapped around her hip. And I also remember that pet cat of our house which had once fought with stray dogs to protect her little kittens and seen dead on the porch, the next day morning. 
Yes, you got it...
 She lives everywhere; in every nuke and corner of existence. 
She can't hide or run away.
 No matter what, she continues to love us all
  And that's why we call her, Mother...

...Mother Earth...Mother Nature..Mother India..
Maa, Amma, Maatha, Mamma, Thaai
The one and only Universal Truth 
Happy Mother’s Day to all the Mothers,
especially to that one awesome lady who gave  space for me in her womb for those ten months and brought me to a wonderful world, where I belong.... 

Thursday, May 9, 2013

They are Wordless..

Since a while she has been trying to find a word to that feeling her heart has been talking about -that indefinable emotion where the words cannot bring into feelings.
Love in excess?
Over secretion of sebum?
Psychic? Emotional? Or obsessed?

No matter if the hormones work or not, when someone talks about 'feelings', she knew that it dwells in her. Only tears could let it her out sometimes. Nothing could be drawn to relate her feelings better.And when the emotion overrules, the words became wordless. 

  And yes, they are these...

..that feeling of how your heart strikes a chord when you hear the acoustic guitar version of a favourite song....that feeling which rushes to mind when you see a firefly in midst of darkness. And it is exactly the feeling you sense when you see a distant lantern hanging before a house which you crossed in a train journey. That lantern gives a feeling. Isn’t it? When you see a mother crossing the road with her little one, how do you feel? You don’t think. But you just feel....the charming dream which you remember waking up from an afternoon sleep. And you feel a feel. Don’t you?

Getting up to that lazy monsoon morning, listening to the beats of rain outside and sipping the warmth of hot steaming coffee given by your mom.  It just simply feel, ‘wow!’ The comfort,coziness..which you cannot define however advanced the Longman's dictionary is...Yes, that feeling to a book which you kept unfinished just because you want to read it on midnight in the coziness of a dim lit light. Many of you do this often...Don’t you? By the way, how about that unforgettable escape to an hilltop with your loved one on a summer day?  And when he takes you out on evening for that long walk and spent hours together near the lakeside, you just go blind...

When your heart skip beats hearing the footsteps of your loved one, is it butterflies on stomach or you eat gooseberries?  You just feel dizzy. And the same feeling you undergo while noting down the favourite lines on your diary from one of those favourite books... Tuning back to the favourite dialogues of some movies do not give you happiness, it makes you flutter...That feeling you get when you hear your favourite song  is playing on FM at the most unexpected hour. And when it fills you with content and awe, can you put down them in words? Impossible... 
When the wind play with your hair, you just smile to yourself. But you feel the same when you see soap bubbles in the air. Don’t you?

Ever come close to the feel of rain drops kissing the mud earth outside your window pane?Or Sitting on the edge of a cliff, watching the sun set, and sharing the most comfortable silence of your life with someone you really love?  When you go for an outing and come back to your home wet and soaked, you know there was an unexpected rain and u know, that feeling you feel is exactly the same. 
....and that is how she feels. No, that is how he makes her feel all the time. Sometimes she can just handle them while other times she just manages to scribble some words...
Is she in love? Everyone asked. But nobody knows..
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